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10 Ways to Tend Eros in Long-Term Relationships

“Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don’t know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of witherings, of tarnishings.” ― Anaïs Nin Anaïs Nin knew that love, sexuality, and creativity can lose their luster through erosion or neglect.  The word “withering” suggests the need to pick

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Awakened Intimacy couple retreats: A safe place for tending Eros

By Julia Corley, Passion and Presence™ facilitator.  I’m involved with Passion & Presence couple retreats because I deeply believe that erotic pleasure is our birthright. Sex is natural, normal, and beautiful.  At its essence, it can be a powerful path to connection with ourselves, our lovers, and the divine. Since I began to consciously know what sex was, it’s always seemed absurd to me that there’s

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6 Ways to be Mindful During Sex

What is Mindful Sexuality and How Can We Access it? Mindful Sexuality is a philosophy, a practice, and a set of skills to cultivate curiosity, heart­fullness and a spirit of erotic exploration. The traditional practice involves bringing gentle awareness to our immediate experience, which is an antidote to automaticity. By turning attention to the present, we become aware of the fullness and depth of our

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Why Erotic Triggers Can Be the Best Foreplay

Recently, a participant in one of our retreats came back into the room with a big smile on her face. “Erotic triggers are the best foreplay,” she gushed, still a bit out of breath. Those in the room knew what she meant, but this might sound a bit peculiar to the uninitiated. So, what exactly is an erotic trigger? How are they formed? How could

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Real Life Sex Can Be Rich-When You Befriend Your Anxieties

Sex-Related Anxieties Abound Real Life Sex is what I have dubbed sex as it happens in the real world versus what happens on-screen. In real life, there are no chiffon dresses, violins, panning away with the camera, “perfect” bodies, or other notions about what “perfect” sex might look like. Nor is it always “smokin’ hot,” spontaneous or even satisfying. Real Life Sex is also filled

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Scary, Scary Good, or Just Plain Good?

When I created our couples’ sexuality retreats, Halko and I assumed droves of growth-oriented pleasure-seekers would jump at the chance to use eroticism as their pathway to healing and transformation. It seemed evident that all those conjugal “roommates” out there (an estimated 20% of couples) would trip over themselves to establish a more vital erotic connection. I could see how our retreats would be just the

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