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Category: Mindfulness

Anti-Racism, Intimacy, and Daring to Be in Discovery

If a genie granted me one wish, it would be to awaken. For me, that means approaching life without filters. I would meet reality as it is and respond with impulses born of the moment, rather than in accord with my habits and programs. Such an expanded consciousness enables us to have novel experiences, ongoingly, rather than re-enacting patterns that confirm our expectations and limiting

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Calming Down Our Anxious Brains in the Age of Social Distancing

It’s an odd disjunction to be in a high-touch field—intimacy, and sexuality—during an epoch of social distancing. At the same time, we are living in a time of forced togetherness as couples and families, while grappling with significant anxiety. Perhaps you feel like the end of days is upon us. Many of us glue ourselves to newsfeeds that tell us the worse is yet to come.

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Compassion is Going Viral in the Face of COVID-19

Here at Passion and Presence, we are well aware that the coronavirus pandemic is a global concern. All of us are facing mounds of uncertainty regarding travel, health, economic well-being, and daily life. In Spain, where Halko and I live, everything but grocery stores, pharmacies, and a few businesses are closing, and residents must stay indoors. No one can say how long we will be

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How to Experience Valentine’s Day the Mindful Way

It’s that time of year again where images of romance, candle-lit dinners, roses, and sexy lingerie herald expectations of great sex. However, over the years, the weight of domestic burdens combined with over-familiarity can make rapturous sex a distant memory.  After years of being together, you may feel like the novelty is washed up as well. Perhaps you’ve been finishing each other’s sentences from the

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Finding Passion and Presence In the Crucible of Cancer

Receiving a cancer diagnosis is a terrifying experience for anyone. My brush with such a diagnosis occurred in September when my doctor urged me to see a urologist to rule out bladder cancer. Medical information abounds online, which is how I became an overnight expert on the two kinds of bladder cancers and the invasive procedures used to diagnose and treat them. My home base

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Why Conscious Connection is More than a Turn On

When we fall in love it’s all sunshine and roses. But down the road, we may find that we are getting sunburn and pricked by love’s thorns on a regular basis. Why the drastic turn around? As part of a committed couple, your partner cannot help but hold a big shiny mirror in front of you whenever you interact. At the “love and roses” stage, we

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Scary, Scary Good, or Just Plain Good?

When I created our couples’ sexuality retreats, Halko and I assumed droves of growth-oriented pleasure-seekers would jump at the chance to use eroticism as their pathway to healing and transformation. It seemed evident that all those conjugal “roommates” out there (an estimated 20% of couples) would trip over themselves to establish a more vital erotic connection. I could see how our retreats would be just the

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Resetting to Sexy (Between those Diaper Changes)

Are you the mother of young kids? Do you seem to have swapped desire for diapers? On becoming proud parents, you’ve seen some of your friends slip into the Not So Sexy Zone, or even the dreaded Sexless Zone, a zone from which few seem to ever fully return. You swore it would never happen to you, but here you are, elbow deep in diapers,

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From Performance to Pleasure: Saying ‘YES’ to Sacred Hedonism

Susan Frioni hosts the podcast LOVE SEX DESIRE from Brisbane, Australia, where she also leads “sexy and soulful” Sacred Dance Parties. Attendees of her next event, themed “Resurrected,” are invited to consider “What part of you is aching to be brought back to life?” Although the dance is a great distance away, Frioni’s question lives very near to my heart. I’ve incurred a few losses

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A Mindful Approach to Your Child’s Emerging Sexuality

Perhaps your small child wants to know what a body part is, say during bath time. Or your son or daughter is dating for the first time, and you are wondering how informed they are when navigating new sexual waters. For many of us, embarrassment and even shame may emerge when we try to talk about these things, despite our best intentions. I was lucky

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